Mother of The Bride Shoes: What Footwear to Wear and What Not to Wear to Your Daughter’s Wedding

As a mother of the bride your daughter’s wedding day one very special indeed and because of this we know that you want everything to be perfect, and this includes your outfit. But, for so many mothers of the bride, there are so many preparations to do in helping your daughter with her day, thinking about what you are going to wear often falls to the bottom of a long list.

In deciding your outfit, finding a dress can be a time-consuming enough process, then thinking about the accessories leads many mothers to simply pick the first thing that looks best. When this comes to shoes, this can quickly become a regret of many mothers.

The great fashion designer Christian Louboutin offers some great advice regarding the importance of finding the right shoe: 'a shoe is not only a design, but it's a part of your body language, the way you walk. The way you're going to move is quite dictated by your shoes.'

We know all too well just how important shoes are to the mother of the bride, and because we are aware of all the things you will have to do by helping your daughter prepare for her big day, we have created this list. We have gone through all the different shoe options for the mother of the bride, assessing their advantages and disadvantages, have considered to what venue and dress code they should be worn. We hope that this list can be the one-stop for a busy mother of the bride, to make sure you find your perfect shoe, without spending forever searching for it.

Stilettoes, do they deserve the position as classic special occasion footwear?

If you are like us, when you think of a black-tie evening event your mind jumps to the classic stilettoed shoe. But, does this thin heeled option really deserve this coveted position?

Well, it is arguably the most elegant of all shoes, heeled or flat. The thin heel with its pointed toe is really very timeless. While also having the advantage of elongating the legs and enforcing a straight back. Such that the elegance of the shoe transfers to your own posture.

But, this outcome can often be an idealized dream, as it is all too easy for you to find yourself with a pair for stilettoes that are so uncomfortable that either, you are forced to take them off within thirty minutes of putting them on, or you are left hobbling to the closet chair. 

So, the first thing that needs to be said when deciding if these shoes should be your go-to, is which camp you fall into, are you able to wear them gracefully for the evening, or are you like so many of us, find the very idea of it sparks a pain in our toes.

If you do feel you are able to wear them without pain, then we agree with this advice 'do test drive your shoes before the wedding' as it is always better to be safe than sorry.

Another thing you want to check is what type of venue you will be wearing these shoes too. It would be a good idea to send a little text to your daughter to make sure you won’t be expected to walk over the grass at any point.

 These shoes are a beautiful option for a formal or black-tie evening wedding, especially if it is in an urban setting. If, after considering all our advice you still hear them calling your name, why not go for it, we wish we could!

If you are unsure about which colour of shoe to wear with your outfit check out this article to help you find your best options. 

Alternative heeled options, what to wear for hight and comfort. 

If you are a mother of the bride who desires the hight and style that comes with wearing a heeled shoe, but you don't want to contend with all the comes with wearing a thin heel, then rest assured, there are options out there for you. 

The best solution for a mother of the bride facing this problem is a wedged heel. As this style of shoe offers all of the benefits that come with a smaller heel; the light, the impact on posture and the touch of glamour. But, wedges are regarded by many as infinitely more manageable. 

Then are seen as a more comfortable option for a few reasons. First, the block heel that covers the whole bottom of the shoe differs to a thinner heel as it gives a much more stable platform. If you are worried about keeping your balance the whole night through then a wedge can be great for you. 

The next reason that wedges offer a more comfortable alternative to their skinner sisters is because of the angle on which they make your foot sit. Much of the drama of a stiletto is created from the long and very slim heel which means, that these shoes make your foot sit at the most dramatic angle possible. 

Whereas the wedged heel is able to have a less acute angle, the larger heel enables a more gradual, less steep angle. The outcome of the different angles of the heels means that the wedge is able to offer you almost the same hight without giving you the same aching pain to the balls of your feet than the slimmer heeled alternative does.

Although wedges may seem like the perfect alternative to the less comfortable stiletto, they do differ slightly in terms of dress code. Stilettos are the perfect formal, black-tie evening shoe, whereas a wedge is often regarded as a more casual alternative. 

There is no doubt that a wedged heel shoe is the perfect footwear option to a summer daytime outdoor wedding. But, does this mean it should be ruled out for other venues and dress codes? We think it would be silly to limit yourself from wearing such a great mother of the bride shoe, especially as there are ways to make this style look much more formal and evening appropriate than first expected. 

If you want to wear a wedged shoe in the colder months of the year, especially if your daughter has chosen to go for an evening wedding, then there are a few things you can do to make sure your wedges look perfect for the occasion. 

First, opting for a darker colour can really give a more formal and wintery impression to the look. Next, make sure that your foot is covered, ie. ensuring the shoe doesn't have gladiator straps or peek-a-boo toes, will enable your footwear to avoid a summer look. If your daughter is having a more formal reception, where you are after a touch of glamour, looking for a wedge shoe with some sparkle, or more intricate designs on them can really help you to elevate your look. 

We think that wedges can be the perfect mother of the bride shoes for those after the added high without all the drama or a slimmer heel. Although they are the perfect summer heel, being aware of a few key elements means that they can stay occasion perfect all year round. For some wonderful affordably prices wedges Asos is a great place to look, or for some designer options check out the great range at net-a-porter.

For those Mother's of the Bride wanting to avoid heeled shoes

We are very aware that although many mothers can't wait to sport a heeled shoe for their daughter's big day, there are also a large number of ladies out there who couldn't imagine spending a whole day on their tiptoes. 

We completely get all the reasons you may be wanting to avoid wearing heels to your daughter's wedding at all costs. But we know that for many women, the worry of flat shoes is that they won't provide the same amount of glamour and elegance as a heeled alternative. But, we think that this is a worry that is unnecessary, today's fashion climate provides women with such a large array of beautiful flat shoes that it is more than possible to find the perfect mother of the bride flat to help you feel your best.  

The first option we will offer to you is the kitten heel and yes we know that when some people hear this phrase the first place their mind goes to is outdated secretary attire. But, rest assured, there are many stylish kitten heels on the market, just look at this website for some inspiration. 

We know that some ladies don't like heels, full stop, anywhere from kitten to stiletto is off-limits, if this is you, don't worry, we have some really wonderful options. Often the worry with a flat shoe is; how can I make it occasion wear? The way of ensuring your footwear looks extra special for your daughter's wedding day, is to keep in mind two things when shopping, shape and fabric. If you opt for something a little more unusual for either of these, you are guaranteed to look perfectly appropriate for a formal dress code. Just check out these wonderful ballet style shoes in velvet by Emma Hope.

Keeping this advice in mind while shopping should help you to find the perfect flat shoe that will work for even the most formal of dress codes.  

How to wear sandals to your daughter's wedding. 

Being easy to find in both heeled and flat options sandals can often be a favourite mother of the bride shoe and for good reason. They are often more comfortable than other heeled shoes, and if they are flat can be easy to find in a style that suits a more formal dress code. 

It isn't hard to find a heeled sandal that will be appropriate for a more dressy wedding, many of which are available online, just check out this website for classic elegance or this one for a more modern style.

But, if you want to stick with a flat shoe, there are a few things to keep in mind to help you find a sandal that will keep perfectly to your daughter's dress code. One thing to consider is the bulkiness of the shoe, for example, a thick strapped Birkenstock (similar to the ones pictured below) is sure to look much more casual than a more dainty alternative.

The next thing to keep in mind is the material that the shoe is composed of. When you think of the traditional, practical sandal, one made of a form or rubber sole with velcro fabric straps, it isn't hard to realise that you need to narrow down your search in terms of material. Try and find a shoe that is made of leather, or more feminine fabrics, that rap around the leg in a gladiator-style, to help avoid a shoe that puts practicality before aesthetic. 

The next thing to think of when looking for a mother of the bride sandal is, what time of year is your daughter's wedding. Just like the wedged heel, this style of shoe is one with a strong association to the warmer months of the year. Due to the composition of many sandals, having open toes and only a few straps to hold down the foot, it is clear to see why the style as a whole has such a summer association.

But, just because they are often regarded as a summer shoe, it does not mean that you shouldn't wear them at other points during the year. Just like with the wedged shoe, keep in mind how covered your foot is. This is because, if worn in winter, an open toe and exposed foot can mean that your feet quickly become chilly and stay this way throughout the evening, providing you with an unnecessary distraction. 

So, if you are after a sandal for the colder months of the year, look for something that is more covered than a summer alternative, which shouldn't be too hard as many shops replace their stock of summer sandals for more weather-appropriate options when the seasons change. For some beautiful, all year sandals check out this website.

What styles of shoes are best to avoid wearing as Mother of the Bride? 

We think that, as the mother of the bride, there are some styles of shoe that it is best to avoid namely, trainers and outdoor shoes. Although we know that the traditions of weddings are quickly becoming replaced by many couples who are preferring instead venues and customs that are more reflective of their individual tastes. But we do think that then it comes to mother of the bride dressing, it is helpful to keep a few of these traditions alive, even if you are choosing to buck most of them. 

Of course, if your daughter is holding her ceremony halfway up a two-hour hiking trail then this section might not be applicable to you. But, for most mother's of the bride, practical footwear is not a necessity on this special day. Because of this, we think that is best to avoid it if only to keep your daughter happy by staying appropriate to her chosen dress code.  

Although there may be exceptions to this rule (such as the beautiful heeled booties below) but in general we think that any shoe that firmly puts practicality before style is not the best choice for the mother of the bride. 

With so many beautiful options out there, from the dramatic, filmstar looks of the stilettos, the elegant wedge and numerous wonderful flat options. The mother of the bride shouldn't find it hard to find a shoe that has both comfort and style that is appropriate for the weather and venue of her daughter's wedding. Now you are prepared with all this advice we think that finding your perfect shoe should be simple, and will be the perfect complement to your mother of the bride look.